Empowering our children through their goals and dreams is something I think we all strive to do. I mean we have kids so that we can pass on some type of legacy and experience some fulfillment by watching our children go through the things we did, but in the hopes that they experience things even more deeply than we do. And we find joy in that.
One thing we all want, is to be that role model for them. To empower them to be a strong individuals.
But how can we do that if we feel we have nothing to pass on? If we feel like we haven’t had success ourselves, or if we haven’t accomplished something to feel proud of. I mean, we want to show our children through our own actions, don’t we?
Although having the experience to pass on to our children is something that would be the easiest, I’m here to tell you that you can empower your children without having the perfect life before having them! As long as you’re willing to step back and truly watch your children grow outside of your own emotions and expectations, you will be able to empower them.
Start will asking them their goals and dreams. NEVER say any of them are silly. Guide them to appropriate goals and dreams, but honor the ones they set. Then think, how can I help them. What could possibly come in their way and how can we deal with it. Stick with their vision and just honor to guide them through their journey.
As an example, I have very goal-oriented kids that dream for the top. They have grown to love the sport of hockey and have found early success in the sport. So, naturally, they’ve said they want to go to the nhl. It is not ON ME to say “well, there are stats that only 0.001% will even have a chance and blah blah blah”. I need to honor their dream and be the one that helps them through this journey. I need to remind them of their strengths daily toward that goal. I need to be the mature one that can see possible roadblocks and start thinking “how can I ensure I help them through those?” As an example, my son couldn’t possibly see he might hit a mental roadblock. So, when I saw a different attitude on the bench, negativity come out, I knew this was a chance to EMPOWER him through this for his dreams. So, I approached him about what I was noticing, asked him if he’s ok, asked him what he thought. I didn’t assume, I didn’t jump on him or tell him what to do. He gave some feedback, I gave some tips how to get through, we talked about mindset, we looked at resources and then one day he woke up and said, I feel different. I think I did it. WOW my mom heart just jumped! What a moment to help empower your child through something!!! Don’t get me wrong, I had a few nights I cried for him and felt worried, but I knew he needed me to be strong. And seeing him go through something and grow because of it was incredibly empowering.
Please be sure, when you’re trying to empower your children, to always keep a clear view from the outside and remember, its not about you, it’s about helping them through something.